Just Turn The Page

Just Turn The Page: July 2014

Wednesday, July 23, 2014


Not too long ago, my mother told me “to make sure I take time to reflect.” She said in-so-many-words that “reflection gives us time to process, to make sense of our lives, and to put things in perspective.” She is right. I am reflective by nature—I observe, think, reflect, and then I write.

However, my problem is not in the “reflecting” it is in the being. I spend an enormous amount of time reflecting, trying to find a way to process life—to process the pains, the joys, the questions, and the hardships, the right and wrong of things, relationships, or lack thereof, and on-and-on that I do not know how to Just Be. What exactly does that mean, anyways? To be honest, I really do not know— at least not yet, but if you decide to journey with me I guarantee we will figure it out along the way. I can only tell you that I want to Just Be, and I can tell you that Just Being is not going to remove the aforementioned.

Every journey has a beginning, so let me share with you how I arrived at this point. And yes, it took a tremendous amount of reflecting, hence the time since my last post. In my post, Tomorrow Has Arrived and the Sun is Radiant I hinted at upcoming changes. Initially, I thought those changes were external only, but God had something entirely different in mind. The external pressures and hardships have not changed, at all. In fact, we are still Waiting on God. My next post, Barbie Doll Christian set into motion the journey that brought me into today.  

 I know you have heard the old adage:

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. George Santayana

 This is true, but knowing without understanding leaves us without the knowhow to change. In fact, it feels more like trying to find your way in the dark. In my memoir, In Search of Mom (currently in the works),  I shared a universal truth: “Most people see only labels, such as alcoholism, abuse, neglect, abandonment, dysfunction, chaos, etc., but most of the time, its broken children trapped in an adult world; expected to be adults, act like adults, and make decisions like adults. However, instead of learning how to become adults, they learned to survive. These adults swear they will never be like their parents, but broken parents raise broken children. I know—I became one…” (Coon unpublished). This is not all encompassing, meaning it does not sum up the problems of the world nor is it blame, and it most certainly does not negate sin. It does emphasize the cycle of generational dysfunction and our need to understand the journey to wholeness, as well as the why behind my meltdown last month, and the kind of change God is initiating in me.  

Be the change you wish to see in the world. Mahatma Gandhi

Gandhi’s words have been my dream, inspiration, and driving force since I became a Christian almost seventeen years ago, which began God’s initiation of change in my life. However, God never does things halfway, and today I find myself starting a new chapter in Him. I hope that my story sparks a knowing in you, a longing, and a desire to know Him more deeply, and if you do not know Him—maybe, just maybe, you might want to. Just Turn the Page and journey with me, as we learn how to Just Be.
Maybe, you are trying to figure out how to Just Be or sense God initiating change in you, please share your story in the comments. Even if your not sure--about anything, including God that's okay. Not only have I been there--sometimes still am, I  do understand. Please feel free to leave a comment or a prayer request. I value YOU, and your journey in this life--your story IS important to me.

 Come back for Part II of Just Be.


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